Wednesday, November 16, 2005

On the Rise

Today I was writing in a tea lounge, when it occured to me that people generally seem more friendly and patient around me these days.

Then I thought to myself, "Enlightenment is on the rise."

I continued thinking, "What if we really did have another period of Enlightenment. And many people were walking around, talking about positive, intelligent things, and coming up with new ideas? Then I wouldn't be better than everyone else. Then I would be jealous. It wouldn't be good at all."

Puts a smile on my face every time.

Why is that so funny to me? Because it's an absurd thought, that I wouldn't want other people to be happy, so that I could be happy just feeling superior to other people.

Of course I want everyone to feel equal. As long as I feel slightly better than everyone else.

That's the joke. That's so funny that its stoopid. Phat. All that.

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin turns to the other muffin and says, "Is it hot in here, or is that just me?" Not an original joke... told to me by my favorite 13 year old client.

Monday, November 14, 2005

Saturday Night in Upstate NY


The moon rising over my friends' neighbors' farm. What?

Sun Set on Horse Farm


Peeking through the trees, the sun says, "goodnight."

Dog and Farm Show


Who needs a dog and pony show? Oh, I do. Looking at the farm, and thinking about how much work my friends are going to be putting into it, it was the first time in a long time that building my comedy routine seemed very, very managable.

Sustainable Farming and Comedy


My friends just bought a farm! Wow. They are going to raise horses on this farm. I used to believe that horses were the key to the next period of enlightenment in the world. After all, horses and humans were partners, for centuries. Now the machine has replaced the horse in many ways. What's a horse to do?

Alienation of modern horse and human, due to technology was a tremendous preoccupation of mine. Go figure. Transference of feeling is quite the miracle of life. Learning how to transfer all of those emotions into comedy, rather than day dreaming about horses saving the world, is my new goal. To heck with the horses....for now.

Friday, November 11, 2005

Construction Paper

A period of enlightenment must follow the dark ages, right? I think our new era, once we get through the current period of time, should be called the era of Construction Paper.

Oh, sure the
Enlightenment had its own advantages. Eras like that of Dadaism and surrealism were important too. And I'm not talking about soap and detergent. Is there actually a soap called Era? Yes! Era is a product you can buy! We're on a roll. Let's get this party started, right? Quickly.

The bottom line is that we need a useful era to make it's way through the backdoor. When I was growing up, the backdoor was always open. Luckily, we lived in a safe neighborhood. But I digress.

So, I thought about just naming the era
Construction. But construction workers can be a bit aggressive towards unsuspecting ladies in short skirts. Construction leads to traffic jams. Basically, although construction is good, it can lead to dysfunction, if not carefully planned out. We, the adult children of the 70's and 80's are all too aware of the terms of dysfunction.

As a result, I say the next era can be named, the era of Construction Paper . I will have to elaborate on your next question, "Why paper," at another time. I will do so, not now. Right now, I am sleepy. I will sum up by writing, remember the words of Miracle Max
"You rush a miracle man, you get rotten miracles."

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Jonny Goldstein, Man of the Hour


The Erzsi and Jonny Show...live!

My comedy partner Jonny Goldstein showed up at the show were I perform on Tuesday nights. Jonny took the time before, during, and after his set to elaborate on his realization that pre-formance is the key to performing. To pre form is to form the performance. He feels the need to use a southern accent when he talks about this.

Friday, November 04, 2005


Running the half marathon in Hungary...waving wildly. My Dad is taking a picture on the left, this was May 2004.

In Honor of the NYC Marathon!

During the day, I'm a fitness professional. By night I prowl the streets of New York City, looking for a stage to do time on - I must do my time. One thing I've noted lately is that I've gotten into a bit of a habit of literally running up onto stage as a stand-up comic. This is silly, like putty for several reasons.

Reason number one: unless I plan to run with all my might I look like I am trotting much like a pony up onto the stage. Should I decide to slow it down a bit and jog carefully with care-free abandon this too looks like bobble-head horsy trot, only in slow motion.

Second, running onto the stage is one of those typical inefficient performance techniques that aren’t technique at all. Who on earth am I running from? Where am I running too? If only on a subconscious level, there must be some question in the mind of at least a few audience members. I'm sure that I've scared a few people in the process. “Watch out! There’s a fast moving redheaded comic running down the aisle, onto the stage! Where’s the fire? What is the rush? Isn’t she the one who got arrested, for putting her feet up in the subway? Maybe there’s a bomb in her shoe. She’s going too fast, get out of her way!”

Last but not least, maybe 5% are thinking, "Boy can she run! What a strong, comic she is. Jennifer Garner ain’t got nothing on this funny running lady!” Ok, so that is the voice of my fantasy life becoming reality. Anyway, this isn't the art of exercise; it's the art of standup comedy. Unless I plan to make a joke about running, why would I run? I know, I know – it’s because I feel like it at the time. And here I am making a joke or two out of it (albeit a very wordy joke). I guess all roads do lead to comedy, if you’re lucky.
View Erzsi Pongo's profile on LinkedIn